Happy Thanksgiving

I can’t really lie to you, those words have very few sincere meanings for me these days. To me it just means a simplified turkey dinner with my wife at home.

I have no family in the immediate area, although my wife does have family that lives a little over 100 miles North from us, but in spite of having been down here in Portland for the past 12 years there has never once been an invitation of any sort around the holidays.

I do have a daughter, that is married and living her own life, and this holiday, among many other holidays and personal celebrations, tend to be marred by the status of our relationship. My daughter was poisoned by her mother over the years to the point that I have been able to be a part of her life for just a few of the past 17 years. Fact is, I have not even seen her in over 3 years now, not a record length of time in our tenuous relationship, but certainly growing worse with every passing day.

Don’t get me wrong, I love my daughter and miss her with every beat of my heart, but after the past 17 years I do my best to live without hope that things will change. It has been my experience that living in hope that maybe this thanksgiving, or this birthday, or this random day will be the day she finally grows up and sees me for the man I am instead of the man her mother has told her I am, is nothing more than a heartwrenching unrequited wait.

So, my wish out there for those of you with children that love you, is to treasure every single moment you have. To never lose sight of things and let anger destroy the relationship you have. To be thankful for every precious minute you have with your child, for you never know when, or how they will be taken from you.

Have a happy thanksgving.

Tony Faville